Paxton
Banned User
Ok, in Poland there is really famous text that describes Tibia, I wanted to traslate it coz it's really funny. Some of the sentences might not sound funny as in Polish. 
Requirment to read it:
- Have experience in Tibia, so you know what r we talking about.
Let's start, the text describes everything and it's really long, there is also something about OTS
The text is 266 lines long, so I will translate from piece to piece from time to time
NOTICE There migh be bad words used, also you might not understand few things such as chair, but Polish people will.
(There was accident that Tibia player almost killed his mother by chair because she switched off his computer)
Let's start.
-------------------------------------------------------
How to start?
What? That means you didn't play this miracle game yet? Man how did you survive? But nothing lost, follow those points and you will become pr0 player.
1. Make sure that chair you are sitting on is tough and ready to physical violence.
2. Go to Tibia website and download client, it's so great that this big fun takes only 15mb isn't it?
3. Now create account.
4. Alright 'soon' you will get e-mail with password. In the language of Tibia developers that means you will get this e-mail maybe in few years time but keep refreshing the inbox anyway.
5. You got it? Alright, create a character now (Notice: In Tibia childs not formate by sex) choose some cool pr0 evul nick so everyone will know who they talking with such as: 'Marcus the kink of tipia'.
6. Nick taken? Add at the end 'Master' or 'Pr0'
7. No, don't read it, the rules are for naabs.
8. Now run the client type number and password.
9. Wow! You logged in! REMEMBER:
- The square on the middle it's you!
- All others squares are noobs!
10. Now press up arrow. Bravo! You know how to move!
11. Click on this fence on the ground, now you are in ditch.
12. Go find some rats, Those ar small grey squares with tail, above they head they got word 'rat'
13. No, it's a noob, not a rat. Tell him to f**k off and keep going.
14. This too.
15. Don't worry, in few hours I'm sure you will find one.
16. You found it? So now kill him and take gold from him.
17. You see those numbers next to the word: 'experience'? It's your exp. You need to get 100, now you have 5, so repeat points 12.-16 19 times.
18. No no no, you can't sleep, you need to be pr0, forget?
19. You got 100 exp now? Now you can go to some better monsters, the best would be rotwors and minotaurs, stay there until you get 4200 exp.
20. If you die go to point 10.
21. If you still live and u have the 4200 exp you can go to talking statue of angel and say you want be knight and live in Carlin.
22. You have to choose Carlin. Venore and Thais are for noobs.
23. And you are on main land!
24. If you are bored of demo version, don't forget to buy premium. (PACC)
NEXT PART SOON
Requirment to read it:
- Have experience in Tibia, so you know what r we talking about.
Let's start, the text describes everything and it's really long, there is also something about OTS
The text is 266 lines long, so I will translate from piece to piece from time to time
NOTICE There migh be bad words used, also you might not understand few things such as chair, but Polish people will.
(There was accident that Tibia player almost killed his mother by chair because she switched off his computer)
Let's start.
-------------------------------------------------------
How to start?
What? That means you didn't play this miracle game yet? Man how did you survive? But nothing lost, follow those points and you will become pr0 player.
1. Make sure that chair you are sitting on is tough and ready to physical violence.
2. Go to Tibia website and download client, it's so great that this big fun takes only 15mb isn't it?
3. Now create account.
4. Alright 'soon' you will get e-mail with password. In the language of Tibia developers that means you will get this e-mail maybe in few years time but keep refreshing the inbox anyway.
5. You got it? Alright, create a character now (Notice: In Tibia childs not formate by sex) choose some cool pr0 evul nick so everyone will know who they talking with such as: 'Marcus the kink of tipia'.
6. Nick taken? Add at the end 'Master' or 'Pr0'
7. No, don't read it, the rules are for naabs.
8. Now run the client type number and password.
9. Wow! You logged in! REMEMBER:
- The square on the middle it's you!
- All others squares are noobs!
10. Now press up arrow. Bravo! You know how to move!
11. Click on this fence on the ground, now you are in ditch.
12. Go find some rats, Those ar small grey squares with tail, above they head they got word 'rat'
13. No, it's a noob, not a rat. Tell him to f**k off and keep going.
14. This too.
15. Don't worry, in few hours I'm sure you will find one.
16. You found it? So now kill him and take gold from him.
17. You see those numbers next to the word: 'experience'? It's your exp. You need to get 100, now you have 5, so repeat points 12.-16 19 times.
18. No no no, you can't sleep, you need to be pr0, forget?
19. You got 100 exp now? Now you can go to some better monsters, the best would be rotwors and minotaurs, stay there until you get 4200 exp.
20. If you die go to point 10.
21. If you still live and u have the 4200 exp you can go to talking statue of angel and say you want be knight and live in Carlin.
22. You have to choose Carlin. Venore and Thais are for noobs.
23. And you are on main land!
24. If you are bored of demo version, don't forget to buy premium. (PACC)
NEXT PART SOON
